• blog,  poetry

    Flower

    Turning inward, shriveled petals Seeking the nurturing power of loving Words never spoken You are beautiful and you are loved. Small, powerless, wilted and bent Deprived of sustenance needed to grow Into magnificence You are beautiful and you are loved. Feeling the sun, receiving its grace The wind whispers the secret through time and space You are beautiful and you…

  • blog,  poetry,  Thoughts

    Amputation

    A part of my heart has been amputated,removed by the scalpel of his words,leaving me wanting for the phantom of our future that is no longer and never will be. A part of my heart has been amputated,it beats differently now, hurt, aching, betrayed,a desperate want to feel the familiar,yet knowing the past is no longer and never was. A…

  • divorce,  Grief,  Thoughts

    You could never forgive me

    That is the last e-mail you sent to me and it has made me angry. My therapist has asked me when I’m going to be angry with you and I think I’m getting there. I am angry because while you seek my forgiveness, you have never forgiven me for my one transgression against you. Your actions for 7 months spoke…

  • blog,  Dating,  new life,  Thoughts

    Let’s be exclusive!

    A couple of men I have dated and who I felt there was a connection to seemed to want to be “exclusive” right away. According to Urban Dictionary, the definition for exclusiveness in a dating relationship means the following: The state of being with one person, and only one person, without labeling yourselves as boyfriend and girlfriend. I will admit at the age of 52,…

  • divorce,  Grief,  Thoughts

    The Maze

    There are times when I feel like I’m not making any progress as I work through this grief. I worry that some people think I should give over it already (including the stbx) and are just tired of me talking about it. There are many times when I feel like I’m doing well and ready to move forward, then I…

  • blog,  divorce,  Grief,  Thoughts

    Death by a Thousand Cuts

    When my  soon to be ex (stbx) informed me on July 2nd, 2017, that we (meaning he) was done, I literally felt like I couldn’t breathe. If he had stood in front of me and punched me in the stomach, I think I would have preferred that momentary pain than the pain he inflicted for seven long arduous months. He…