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Flower
Turning inward, shriveled petals Seeking the nurturing power of loving Words never spoken You are beautiful and you are loved. Small, powerless, wilted and bent Deprived of sustenance needed to grow Into magnificence You are beautiful and you are loved. Feeling the sun, receiving its grace The wind whispers the secret through time and space You are beautiful and you…
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Suck it up Buttercup!
When you start missing him, you need to remind yourself of the torture he inflicted upon you. Someone who claims to love and care about another would not have done what he did. You need to remind yourself that you are worth so much more than the love he chose to give when he felt like giving it as if…
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Dating and Loving Yourself
While dating, I am also working on myself. The damage done during the end of my marriage brought up a lot of trauma that I had managed to bury for many years.
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Choices
We all have choices. I have chosen to fight for myself. I am worthy of that. If you cannot be a warrior by my side. And let the enemy enter the gate, You have chosen to fight against me. And I choose to let you go.
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Amputation
A part of my heart has been amputated,removed by the scalpel of his words,leaving me wanting for the phantom of our future that is no longer and never will be. A part of my heart has been amputated,it beats differently now, hurt, aching, betrayed,a desperate want to feel the familiar,yet knowing the past is no longer and never was. A…
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this dating thing can suck
I got married young. I met the ex at the age of 19 and married him at the age of 20. I can count on one hand the number of guys I dated prior to meeting the ex and I would have a couple of fingers left. That’s how inexperienced I am with this whole dating thing. I guess what…
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You could never forgive me
That is the last e-mail you sent to me and it has made me angry. My therapist has asked me when I’m going to be angry with you and I think I’m getting there. I am angry because while you seek my forgiveness, you have never forgiven me for my one transgression against you. Your actions for 7 months spoke…
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Let’s be exclusive!
A couple of men I have dated and who I felt there was a connection to seemed to want to be “exclusive” right away. According to Urban Dictionary, the definition for exclusiveness in a dating relationship means the following: The state of being with one person, and only one person, without labeling yourselves as boyfriend and girlfriend. I will admit at the age of 52,…
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The Maze
There are times when I feel like I’m not making any progress as I work through this grief. I worry that some people think I should give over it already (including the stbx) and are just tired of me talking about it. There are many times when I feel like I’m doing well and ready to move forward, then I…
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Death by a Thousand Cuts
When my soon to be ex (stbx) informed me on July 2nd, 2017, that we (meaning he) was done, I literally felt like I couldn’t breathe. If he had stood in front of me and punched me in the stomach, I think I would have preferred that momentary pain than the pain he inflicted for seven long arduous months. He…
