Moving on

I don’t think that anyone with true, deep feelings for someone else, ever stops loving them. I know that for some getting to a place where you stop caring for the person who betrayed you is the end goal and I’m here to tell you that it’s okay if you never stop caring. I think what is important is acknowledging the feelings and working to a place of acceptance. My ex will always be an important part of my life because of how he helped me to become the person I am today. And the fact remains (as I’ve said before), I could not have asked for a better dad for our kids.

I often told people I would never marry again. I never wanted to experience the intense pain that I experienced at the end of my marriage. I’m also a person who enjoys companionship, intimacy, being in love and having my person. I had to be willing to move forward and be willing to risk having my heart broken again. And it was more than once during the time I spent dating. I would have my hopes built up and then dashed over and over again. It was necessary for me to go through it because each time I experienced a little heart break, it showed me my resiliency.

In my head, I would tell myself have fun with dating and maybe I will be one of those women who has a lot of fun being single. For the most part, I enjoyed dating and getting to meet new people. I truly tried to look at it as an adventure and not to take it too seriously (but I also catch feelings pretty quickly) and just have fun. Live a life I didn’t get to experience when I was younger because I married so young.

I didn’t expect to meet anyone that I would want to spend the rest of my life with and yet I did.